[00:00:00] Cynthia Garcia: Life is so short and so precious. You don’t want to spend it chasing someone else’s dream or feeling burnt out or not getting to spend time with the people you care about the most. So do some deep work around this, sit with it, see what comes up for you and then take action. It’s your life. And you get to change it at any given.

Hello. Hello. Hello and welcome back to the Transformational Nutrition Podcast. The podcast that is redefining nutrition as anything that beats you physically, mentally and spiritually. I’m your host. Cynthia Garcia, the founder and CEO of ITN. And today we are talking about work-life balance and really.

Why you shouldn’t even need to have something called work-life balance in the first place. Now, listen, let’s just get right into it. Joey, I’m going to be completely honest. I take a very different approach to the whole concept of work life balance. In fact, here at ITN, we don’t even call it work-life balance.

If we refer to it at all, other than just our life, we call it work life integration. Work life balance is an outdated concept and it just doesn’t work anymore in our modern day world. And here at ITN, we’re all about modern concepts and certifying modern coaches to deal with the real problems and the real issues that we face in this world.

Because what I’ve seen is that most coaching and coaching programs were created for a world that no longer exists. And so. Forward thinking here. Right? Really looking forward to what’s next. And what’s going to serve as the way we live our lives right now. So the truth is you shouldn’t need to balance anything when it comes to work in life, your work should be an extension of who you are and it should integrate seamlessly into your life.

Now, I haven’t always thought this way, like full disclosure, there was a time when I was considered a major workup. I didn’t have any sort of work-life integration. And I certainly did not have balance. Like I didn’t think about balance back then. Cause it wasn’t a thing for me. I don’t think about it now because it’s not necessary.

I just live my life differently. But back in the day I had. Kind of been my own boss for a long time. I mean, now it’s what 17 years. And I feel like I’ve done a lot of integration of my work into my life because I’m extremely passionate about what I do. I am doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing on this planet.

I am living my mission. I show up for it every day and that’s my life. It’s not anything that I consider deep strenuous work that somehow isn’t in alignment with who I am as a person. And I think that alignment is really the key, but I do remember when I first started out, hadn’t really found my way. As a coach, I hadn’t really found my bigger purpose, the bigger meaning for my life.

And I was just going through the motions. I was constantly working. I had something to prove, you know, I came from nothing. I grew up in extreme poverty and I was desperate to create a different life for myself. And I thought that required working. All the time. I thought that I had to work hard or I didn’t deserve the things that I wanted in my life.

I miss birthday parties, holiday gatherings time with my friends. I even sacrificed my own health to chase a goals that didn’t even serve me. That left me feeling burnt out. I remember back in the day, like my husband sent me down at one point and said, you know, I never see you anymore. And when I do see you, you’re not even here.

And that was, that was the truth. I mean, when I did make the effort to clear my schedule and spend time with my loved ones, I wasn’t really present. I was stressed and I was thinking about work and they could tell, they could tell that I wasn’t even there. I mean, look, there were days that I’d be in my office at a quarter to five and I wouldn’t leave until after midnight.

That’s how bad it got. I was putting all this pressure on myself because I thought I had to, I thought I was slacking off. If I wasn’t working all the time. I was so scared to go back to square one. I didn’t want that life. So I kind of doubled down things got worse. I was working all the time. I was exhausted.

I was feeling defeated because it didn’t matter what I did. It was never good enough. My health problems were continuing to get worse. My relationships were taking it. And it was really, really tough. And around that time I got divorced. And I remember at the time my ex husband now saying to me, you can’t be married to me.

You’re married to your work. You can’t be married to anyone you’re married to your work. And at first I took great offense to that and I was so close to being like, no. And then I realized he was right. I was,

we love spotlighting the unique stories and transformations of our students and graduates here at ITN this week. I’m excited to introduce Jessica Davis and give her a chance to talk about her own journey of becoming a certified transformational nutrition coach. Let’s start by learning about Jessica’s background.

[00:05:43] Jessica Davis: I was a performing arts student. So I was a dance major in high school. And then I was also a dance major in college. And really, I do have to say that that probably started my health journey. So being in front of mirrors, in a leotard and tights for multiple hours in a day with other girls my age and everything like that really reinforced.

Comparison idea for me, I was always comparing myself to others and then dance can be very competitive. So I feel like my whole life, everything kind of revolved around looks and appearance. And then, you know, you start to tie your work to that. So I noticed that. I found my identity and my self worth in the way that I looked.

And that really did a number on my mental health at the same time. Going through some health issues related to chronic stress. They were, you know, my hormones were all over the place. My weight was sort of fluctuating and people were really noticing, I don’t even think it was fluctuating that badly, but you know, a few pounds here or there and people because I was in the dance world, people were commenting on it and it really bothered me.

I was not taking care of my body. ’cause, I didn’t know how at the time. And that made me really want to move away from dance because dance was too physically demanding for me time. And I was at the same time realizing that maybe it wasn’t even who I was. I had always put my identity there because I started when I was eight years old and it was my life.

[00:07:34] Cynthia Garcia: So when I say this striving for balance, isn’t a good option. It’s because I’ve experienced it firsthand. I know what it looks like, and I know what it’s like to put everything in that. And then to fail because I was focused on the wrong thing. I also know that I am not alone. There’s a lot of people out there who are relating to a lot of what I’ve gone through.

Maybe you can relate, maybe you have your own story. So let’s talk about this and how I changed my mindset on the whole work-life balance topic and how you can do it. And before we dive into that deep breath, I wouldn’t take a little detour to touch on something. Cause I have a feeling that this question is going to come up.

So yes, I fully believe that your work should be an extension of yourself, your purpose, your mission. I believe it should be integrated into your life. So you don’t feel the need to balance anything. I also know that there’s a fine line between being passionate about what you do and feeling fulfilled in that position and then turning into a workable.

And I have crossed that line a few times in the past. So I know a little something about it. You see as much as you want your job to fuel your fire and give you purpose and make you happy. You still don’t want it to become the only thing you focus on. So I want to run through a few red flags for how, you know, you’re crossing that line to becoming a workaholic.

And this can happen, especially if you’re an entrepreneur or you’re busy running your own business, or you have a side hustle that you’re creating. First of all, are you working longer than other people in your field? Now, look, I know if you’re an entrepreneur, you may not have any employees yet, or a team or other people to help you out.

And so you’re like, I am just doing what I need to do to get this business off the ground. I totally understand that. And there might not even be a way for you to quantify. Are you working more than the average entrepreneur? So, what you want to do though, is consider a normal Workday. For most people. A normal work day is usually a nine to five with an hour lunch break.

Do you work longer than that? And again, I know you’re an opera entrepreneur. I know you’re getting things up and running. I know that sometimes we all work late nights or early mornings. I get it. But if it’s consistent, then that’s a red flag. Let’s tune in again to discover what Jessica did after leaving her career in dance and how this allowed her to find her passion in nutrition, coaching.

[00:10:06] Jessica Davis: When I was leaving the dance world, I was kind of focused on two things. And one of those things was being a fitness instructor because dancers are naturally very good at being fitness instructors, because we can really talk about the body. So I was focusing on fitness and I was really starting to get passionate about this.

And then at the same time, I was noticing that all of my clients who were in my classes really needed help with nutrition because they would be coming and they would not be seeing the results. And I knew from having to learn to take care of myself after having the hormonal issues and the chronic stress and just my body being completely run down from Dan’s.

I started learning how to take care of myself. And I started learning that no matter what you’re doing movement wise, you need to still be supporting yourself nutritionally. At that time, I was actually struggling with whether or not, so I wanted to potentially go into counseling or I wanted to be a nutrition.

And I didn’t know which one I wanted to do. And anytime I would go to look into like counseling programs and really make the decision, I would kind of have this like empty feeling, like there’s something missing. And that was really for me, the nutrition aspect, like I needed to incorporate nutrition into the mental health.

And then, so when I found ITN and how they incorporate the three pillars, Mental health, the science pillar, and then the spiritual health that really spoke to me because I knew that in my own experience, if I only focused on nutrition, it still did not necessarily make a difference. If I wasn’t doing well spiritually and emotionally.

[00:12:05] Cynthia Garcia: The next sign you should look for is if you can’t shut work off. Now, I experienced this when I was working way too much, and this is what I was saying. Like, I would be present with people, but not really there. I’d be thinking about my work the whole time I was with them. I would even take out my phone and like jot down notes or Google something real quick, or send myself an email so that I had it when I wasn’t with these other people.

And I was back to. Right. So that is obviously an issue. Now you might say, well, you know, Cynthia, I quit working at 5:00 PM. Most nights. I do stuff on the weekends with friends. So I’m good. But the key here, isn’t where you are. It’s where’s your head at? So when you’re at the movies with your partners, are you immersed in the film?

Are you thinking about that email you forgot to send earlier, or maybe that deadline that’s coming. To be honest, it should be more likely that you’re thinking about your group fund plans and about the person that you’re there with and about the experience that you’re having then your work. Right. So think about that wherever you are.

Are you really. And third, if you just don’t feel well in any area of health, physically, mentally, or spiritually, maybe you never feel like you have enough time to make a good meal for yourself. So you resort to junk food and you have snacks and whatever you can get, just so that you’re not hungry anymore.

Or maybe you just eat really quickly so you can get right back to it. And as a result, you have stomach aches or indigestion issues. That is a warning. Right. Or maybe you’ve just stopped working out already because you don’t have time because you have too much work to do. And you’re feeling the health effects of that.

Listen, your job and what it takes to do it shouldn’t cause you to feel physically, mentally, or spiritually unwell in any way at any time. That’s important. So check in on that and see if that’s something that you’re noticing. One of our favorite things is finding out what our graduates enjoyed the most about the transformational nutrition coach program.

When we asked Jessica this question, she explained

for 

[00:14:18] Jessica Davis: me, it was the coaching community that I gained. And I think the coaching. Aspect of ITN and having the coaching labs. That was just so powerful because we’re not just on our own, going through the materials and trying to piece it all together. We have people that we can actually interact with and I’ve become very good friends with several of the people that I met through it.

And I think being a part of the community. Of people who want the same things as you is so incredible.

[00:14:57] Cynthia Garcia: Now, something else to pay attention to is, are your relationships strained? I talked about this already. My friends and family could see right through any facade I was putting up. They knew that I wasn’t really there. I being present and that hurt them a lot. They felt like I wasn’t making them a priority.

And if I’m being honest, They were right. Right. And I thought they weren’t being understanding enough. I thought they couldn’t see like the work I was doing and where I was going with it. So it was a really tough time. And I had some really tough conversations and those conversations needed to happen.

Quite honestly, I’m better off that they did and have different and better friendships because of that. It was ended up being a really great thing. So check in with yourself, check in with those close to. And see where you stand. Now. The other thing that I want to share with you, and it’s one of the most eye-opening things that I found while I was doing research on this topic, you need a better work-life integration.

If you find yourself, tying yourself, work to your work success. Now I have experienced this. I definitely have, I have definitely found myself worth in my value in. Projects that I’ve created or programs that I’ve launched. I definitely won’t lie about that. And it’s hard, you know, when you’re your own boss and it’s hard when you’re creative and it’s hard when you’re a creator, but it’s not impossible.

I know. I mean, listen, I’d have days where I’d feel invincible. Cause I get so much stuff done. I felt happy. I’d feel motivated. I’m like I am crushing it. I’m just killing it. It felt great. And then maybe the next day I didn’t have those big wins. And I felt like somehow that meant I wasn’t working. Right.

Or I get some constructive criticism and I would take it so personally, it was just so tough at the end of the day, you were not your job. You’re not your accomplishments. You were not the, the ladder of success that you reach. Like none of those things, no matter how passionate you are about what you do, your worth is not determined by how much money you make, your happiness shouldn’t fluctuate based on the wins that you had that day.

In your career and sure. It’s okay to celebrate them. Of course it is. But it shouldn’t be the only thing that gives you value since completing her certification. Jessica has been working hard to build her dream career as a nutrition coach. Let’s hear what she’s been up to lately.

[00:17:37] Jessica Davis: I work remotely for a tech company and I do their operations for them, but I also am doing one-on-one coaching on the side and I’m thinking that my one-on-one coaching will take over very quickly and I’ll be able to leave my full-time job faster than I originally thought I was thinking it was going to take a little bit long.

But people are actually really in need of help. And so when, you know, I’m able to connect with people and they find out that I do nutrition coaching and they actually really do seem interested. And I think people are so like, what should I do? Should I do this diet? Should I, do you know what this other person is doing?

And they don’t know how to find. For themselves, what they need. So I’m close to being able to do one-on-one coaching. Full-time.

[00:18:33] Cynthia Garcia: All right. So now that we’ve touched on being a workaholic, have you got that out of the way? And it’s definitely something that is a great idea for you to revisit. Let’s talk about the bigger issue here. Let’s get back on track. And that is so again, workaholic, that’s one thing. The bigger issue is if you feel like you’re in desperate need of work-life balance, you’re probably in the wrong career.

If you’re constantly feeling burnt out, stressed, tired, or frustrated with. You’re probably in the wrong career. If you’re constantly having to choose between work or life, or you find yourself seeking balance, you’re probably doing the wrong work. It doesn’t matter how much money you make and what your title is.

Work should be something that lights you up that makes you feel proud. That gives you purpose and fulfillment that allows you to experience meaning, to feel alive. And I don’t think this is something that we talk about enough. You see so many articles and podcast and research. So much of it is done on how to create this perfect work-life balance, but we’re not going deeper into the root cause of this issue.

Why are we feeling so burned out from work? Why do we need more balance? These are the questions we need to be asking. And so I want you to think about something for just a moment. I want you to ask yourself when you feel the most alive, when you feel the most ignorant. Maybe you have a passion project, like a blog or a cookbook that you spend your free time working on and it just brings you so much joy.

Or maybe you absolutely love talking to other people about workouts or sharing how you get in your movement every day. Maybe find yourself dreaming about becoming a coach or starting a business. These things that you focus on during your spare time and those off moments where you’re feeling maybe stressed and burnt out on your job.

And you think, man, this, this is so much better over here on this side, or maybe you see people doing the thing that you would love to do, and somehow feel like you’re just stuck. Those are all indications. That you need to reconsider if the career that you have, and the work that you’re doing is really what you should be doing.

Does it feed you and help you grow and transform, or does it just take things away, including your health and your relationships? So instead of thinking about how you can achieve balance, think about the thing that would feed. What sort of career would blend into your life and your happiness without needing extra days off or reminders to shut your phone off at night, your career should be something that serves your life, not hinders it.

And if it’s not serving your life, they want you to think about that because life is too short to do work. You don’t love with people you don’t like for less money and more. It’s not the way it’s supposed to be. Life is so short and so precious. You don’t want to spend it chasing someone else’s dream or feeling burnt out or not getting to spend time with the people you care about the most.

So do some deep work around this, sit with it, see what comes up for you and then take action. It’s your life. And you get to change it at any given. All right. Let’s hear from Jessica one last time, as she shares a couple of things that she wishes she would have known when she was starting her coaching career.

Hopefully this can inspire other people looking to become a coach as well.

[00:22:06] Jessica Davis: I wish I would have known that this process can be. Because olive always just wanted to be there already and never really enjoyed the process of not being quote unquote there yet, wherever there is being here where I am right now, 10 be enjoyable. And people feel that when you’re having fun, you know, people feel that when you’re enjoying life and you’re doing what you love, then.

You know, they will be attracted to you and they won’t feel like you’re trying to target them in any way. Like I’m trying to help lose weight because I think you need to lose weight. No, I honestly, you know, trying to help people. And that’s what I love doing is really helping people restore their relationship to themselves and their bodies and their minds.

So I think having fun in the process. I definitely was not doing that. At first, I was in a scarcity mindset at first and I was thinking that I was not deserving of it. And I was just having no fun because I was working my full-time job during the day. And then I would. On the computer again, trying to work on my business during the night.

And there was no time for fun in there. Well, if you’re not having fun, your energy is definitely not fun for other people. I think the only other thing that I’ve really been focused on is coming into things as you are now, because. I think we learned that at the very beginning of ITN show up, you know, you know, enough just show up how you are.

And we teach people that too, we teach our clients to show up at the gym, how you are now. You don’t have to be there already. So really I’m focusing on instead of have, do be I’m focusing on be, do have. So being before I have the thing and really just showing up as my authentic self.

[00:24:10] Cynthia Garcia: Alright, thank you so much for tuning in. I hope this has served you in some small way today. If it has three, share it with someone you think would benefit from it. Also, please rate and review the podcast so that we can get messages just like this out to so many more people. And I would be. Ever grateful.

If you want to go deeper on discovering how you can find a career that really serves your deepest needs. I believe I have found the dream career and I think I know what it is. You can find out too, over at transformationalnutrition.com/dreamcareer. So transformationalnutrition.com/dreamcareer. I put together a whole mini series on what I believe is the perfect career and how you can do it with ease, success, and deep the Fillmont.

So check it out and you can see all the show notes and other resources for this episode over at transformationalnutrition.com/episode017 and I will be back again next week with another exciting.